Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Family stuff

Ellie has been spending a great deal of time with me recently, mostly because she is my personal slave. It is always good to have someone that worships the ground that I walk on. Hehe if she were to read this I would be smacked.

Ellie and Tina are not really getting along at the moment and because I have a fucked sister that cares more about her bullshit work and fucking carrer than she does about her kids, Ellie turns to me.

My house has become her haven, which suits me just fine, I have an extra spare of hands and she doesn’t mind being dragged to baby shops, not like Tim who is a bit bored by them now. “Why look when we are not ready to buy” is his motto, obviously he doesn’t get the whole shopping thing.

My sister while continues to promise her girls “As God is my witness I will never drink again”. Cannot keep away from her good old friend Al (alcohol). My BIL is of no help what so ever, if people come over for a dinner party it is apparently a tradition to offer spirits to the guests when they arrive.

So when you arrive, there on the coffee table are about 5 different spirit bottles present, from vodka to baileys, now I guess that for someone that can’t seem to control their drinking having a wide selection of alcohol readily available…at your finger tips doesn’t help.

It is also apparently a tradition to offer wine with your meal, so when BIL asks what everyone would like to drink, my SIS pipes up on the top of her voice “F am I allowed a glass of wine?”. Being a very private person my BIL doesn’t like people to know that they have problems in the house, so he hides it and gets her one. So she is back to square one. Instead of drinking one glass she goes onto finishing the bottle.

I don’t speak to my sister much when she has been drinking as I just can’t handle the same stupid fucking questions being asked and the verbal bullshit that comes out of her mouth. It is obvious to everyone that sits at these dinner parties that she has a problem and I know that there is nothing that can be done until it is admitted. But how many phones does it take saying “I can’t stop drinking, I’m not happy” (and there have been many) for my sister to realise that this is a big problem.

On Saturday it was Tina’s birthday and she was up to her old tricks and honestly I felt like I was conspiring to murder cause I didn’t say anything. Both Tina and Ellie have to say to their mother, “No more drinks, you have had too much”. Tina just turned 13, when this is said in front of people they are reprimanded after the event for spilling “Family issues infront of people”. The people that are present at these times are that Family, Tim and I and BIL parents, yet BIL continues to sweep things under a rug.

I personally don’t know what to do, I can’t fix things but I no longer want to be apart of the charade. Plus I feel that Ellie and Tina need me, do I continue to turn a blind eye? Do I ask before I go if alcohol is being served and if yes then refuse to go?

People in the PC, what would you do in my shoes?


Kim said...

It sounds like you're doing a great job already. Just being there for the girls and supporting them is probably what they need most right now. I don't know how you can help your sister without intervening. And I really don't know anything about alcholism but I'm not sure an intervention would be much point if she's not ready to take the necessary steps herself.

Mari said...

Thanks Sassy that is what I was worried about, there is really nothing that I can do, but I can't help feel that I'm turning a blind eye everytime this happens.

Anita said...

I would go for Tina, but I would state my hesitation at coming at all knowing that your sister is inclined to have way too many...just make sure you tell her before she gets into the AL.

$hit this is hard but I am feeling for you...